February 28, 2007

Stairway To Bob & Tom Guests

Tom often asks frequent guests whether they have a 'Stairway to Heaven' bit - something that audiences expect to hear in the act every time. Sometimes, a StH bit even has a genesis as a B&T appearance; for instance, if you're a fan, what do you think of when I say 'marsupials?'

The problem is that they have so many guests that it's hard even for a completist listener like me to keep them straight, so I'm starting to keep a list of frequent guests and their best-known bits, songs, or characteristics. This blog entry is definitely a living one, and if I can figure out how to do it, I'll keep comments open indefinitely so you can suggest additions.

  • Mike Armstrong: Former police officer. "'Drunk again!'/'Me too!'" More here.
  • Heywood Banks: Big Butter Jesus, 18 Wheels On A Big Rig, Wiper Blades. Alter ego - Dash Ampersand ("I'm Daytona 500-pound woman," "sure can make good pork sausage").
  • Tim Bedore: Wednesdaily 'Vague But True.' Animal conspiracy.
  • Ross Bennett: Dating a woman "who can comfortably conceal an acre of Mexico" who wears her pain like a small skinless creature constantly being hit by a vinegar drip. Grandma & wrestling.
  • Mike Birbiglia: Secret Public Journal, 'Medium Man On Campus' tour. Last name often purposefully mangled by the gang (e.g., 'Brigleby,' 'Bahooski') because club MCs always used to do that too. Brother Joe is 'America's Guest.'
  • Jeff Caldwell: Former civil engineer; used to design sewage pumping stations.
  • Tim Cavanaugh: Former Catholic school teacher. One Minute Songs. Get Drunk With Dignity, Piston Souvenirs
  • Frank Caliendo: Formerly of Mad TV. Impersonations galore; most notably, John Madden and Ted Knight. More here.
  • Pat Dailey: (You Oughta Come With Me When I Go) Out Drinkin', You're There
  • Scott Dunn: Roasts of historical figures
  • John Feinstein: Sports author ("A Good Walk Spoiled," "Season on the Brink," "Next Man Up")
  • Jim Gaffigan: Hot Pockets, "Aaaaaaaand CUT!", the power of cake. Tom's favorite human being.
  • Nick Griffin: Einstein and marriage.
  • Greg Hahn: "High five, myself, no friends!" Women & Points. Non-alcoholic beer bit from the first Bob & Tom Comedy Central special. Does corporate gigs where he pretends to be a serious businessman as part of his act.
  • Drew Hastings: 'fine-boned with gazelle-like movements.' Owns persistently unsuccessful farm in southern Ohio. Owns opera house in small Ohio town. Alter ego: 'success' guru Jack Freeman. Appeared in July of 2004 with Rupert Boneham, fresh off Rupert's million-dollar win in Survivor: America's Tribal Council, and reacted badly when all the listener calls were for Rupert. More here.
  • Tom Mabe: Telemarketer prank phone calls
  • Mike MacRae: Indiana Jones impersonations
  • Sean Morey: The Man Song, The Woman Song, He Said/She Heard, Dealbreaker, Dear Santa
  • Paul & Storm: "News To Us." Formerly (temporarily?) part of DaVinci's Notebook.
  • Henry Philips: She's Talking Again, Mystery Girl
  • Kevin Pollak: Christopher Walken impersonations ("Frankenstein never scared me... marsupials do... 'cause they're fast.")
  • Brian Regan: flying with a computer ("Computer coming through! COMPUUUUUUTER!"). "Have a good flight."/"You too!"
  • Bill Scheft: Author and head writer for David Letterman. Sports Illustrated column 'The Show.' "Time Won't Let Me", "The Ringer."
  • Todd Snider: Beer Run, Iron Mike's Main Man's Last Request
  • Dan St. Paul: First baseball game (and sequels).
  • Doug Stanhope: Rooting for the Yankees is like going to a casino and rooting for the house.
  • Paul Thorn: Former boxer. It's A Great Day (To Whup Somebody's Ass)
  • Greg Warren: 'Flute Man,' "Flute'cha flute, Graig!" Former college wrestler. More here.
  • Tim Wilson: First Baptist Bar & Grill, Church League Softball Fistfight, I Could Be Wrong
  • Roy Wood, Jr.: Cop radio call impersonations. "I'm not gay, but for $4 million, I could be 'confused' for a night." More here.
  • Todd Yohn: Orange Barrels, Red On The Head
  • Bob Zany: Tuesdaily 'The Zany Report,' 'Fix-The-Joke, Baby'


Posted by Chris at February 28, 2007 12:57 PM

Category: Bob & Tom

Frank Caliendo (sp?): John Madden, Superfriends + announcer, Jay Leno (basically his barrage o' imitations routine... but Madden is his signatorio)

Paul Thorn: it's a great day (to whup somebody's ass) ... although this borders on one-hit-wonder-hood

Also, do Paul and Storm get asked to do the "Enormous" song?

Posted by: chess h at March 1, 2007 05:52 PM

Hey Hey Hey....Jackson, Mississippi!!!!!! I am in Vidalia, La, next to Natchez, Ms. I say your station ROCKS MY CLOTHES OFF!!!!! Peter, when you get your detox over and done with, please ask the cool chics in Ntz to party with you on the new porch. Me, well, I'll party with you....clean colon or not. Keep rockin in your air chair and I'll keep my ears on!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: kellie at March 2, 2007 10:48 PM

kellie - I'm not sure you're talking to who you think you're talking to, because I'm about five states away from where you are (so is chess, in case it matters).

chess - I fixed the Paul Thorn entry (don't know what happened to the link) and added one for Frank.

Posted by: Chris of Dangerous Logic at March 3, 2007 06:05 PM

Hey... you posted an entry a while ago about the Donkey Show 3rd CD, and how you were sure that Tom got the date wrong by a few months. Well... a bit of research shows Tom might have a point


I think Drew's entry has to include that day, though.

Posted by: Alex at March 3, 2007 09:31 PM

I should have thought to check the Wayback Machine. Yeah, it looks like you (and Tom) have the right day. Comparing that to the October 7 (not 8, like I originally had) show, it looks like the October 7 show had replays from the July 14 show. Maybe Rupert and Drew appeared together again, maybe they didn't; the program guide is kind of ambiguous. At any rate, I need to A) update my 7/12/06 entry to reflect this, and B) link to it from this entry.

Posted by: Chris of Dangerous Logic at March 3, 2007 11:56 PM

Upon further review, it turns out that I actually have the shows archived back to May of 2004, so I listened to both shows. The 7/14/04 show is definitely the one that appears as the extra disc on Donkey Show; the October 7 show is a 'Best Of' introduced by Jimmy 'Mad Dog' Matis, and just replays hour 3 from 7/14.

Posted by: Chris of Dangerous Logic at March 4, 2007 12:37 PM

Heywood Banks did a very popular bit on Bob & Tom called, "It's a Great Day (to Whoop Somebody's Ass)"

Posted by: Ed at March 20, 2007 08:53 AM

Actually, that was Paul Thorn. I've got Paul listed above.

Posted by: Chris of Dangerous Logic at March 20, 2007 10:01 AM