January 03, 2005

No Dead Pool For You! One Year!

About this time last year, I thought "Dammit! I forgot to join Dead Pool 2004!" Fortunately, this year (or rather, late last year - like really late - like noon on New Year's Eve) I remembered, and so I'm currently in first place in this year's Dead Pool.

Tied with everybody else.

With zero points.

Here's my roster, by category. In parentheses after each entry is the number of Poolers picking the prosepective stiff.

    Fear And Loathing In The Former Soviet Union:
  • Eduard Shevardnadze. Former president of Georgia, just not 'former' enough for some people. (4)
  • Viktor Yushchenko. The Russian FSB will try again, and they'll be successful. Y'know, they're really slipping - the KGB would have gotten it right the first time, and we wouldn't figure out how they did it for another ten years. (10)
  • Ivan Rybkin. Russian reform politician - not a real growth industry right now. Ran for President against Putin in 2004. Disappeared for a few days late in the campaign to 'generate publicity.' Generated so much that he dropped out of the race. Leader of a political party that split, with the leader of the rival faction getting himself whacked. (Solo!)
  • Boris Yeltsin. His liver checked out years ago; his body will surely follow soon. (13)
    Generic Old Famous Farts:
  • Pope John Paul II. I think dude may be dead already, and they're just propping him up and moving his mouth Muppet-style. (88 - the most-selected potential deader)
  • Dick Clark. His next show: American Can'tstand. (36 - fifth-most-selected)
  • Betty Friedan (Solo!)
  • I.M. Pei (Solo!)
  • Y.A. Tittle. I just wanted to be able to say 'Tittle.' (Solo!)
  • Bo Schembechler. It'd break my heart if he died, but he's already had two heart attacks, more heart intrigue this year, and Michigan's defense played bad enough the second half of this season to put him in his grave. (Solo!)
  • Joe Paterno. Because it's the only hope Penn State has of being a top twenty team again in my lifetime. (3)
    Doesn't Some Rapper Get Capped Every Year?
  • 50 Cent. He's been driven-by already, so the potential's there, but in retrospect I think Suge Knight might have been a more likely pick. (8 for 50 Cent, 4 for Suge Knight)
    Department of Wishful Thinking:
  • Janeane Garofalo. Used to be funny, and almost attractive. Amazing what terminal BDS can do to a person. (Solo!)
  • Ted Rall. Just a loathsome human being. There are very few people that I think the world would be better off without; he may be one of them. (3)

Posted by Chris at 06:46 PM | Comments (0)
Category: Dead Pool