July 29, 2005

Smash Your Car, Collect Your 72 Raisins! Offer Also Good For Human Torch!

In the course of looking up the most undignified way to do away with Abu Hook-za, I learned something interesting about Islam: according to Ask The Imam, Muslims who die in accidents - if they're the right kind of accidents - are considered shaheed (martyrs) and can drive in the express lane to Heaven!

Category 1: Sudden Impacts:

My sister passed away in a terrible car accident. What happens to Muslims who die in such accidents?

We are very sad to hear of the sudden death of your sister. May Allah Ta’ala grant you Sabr and reward your sister abundantly. She is indeed fortunate as she is a Shaheed. Among those enumerated as Shuhadaa, Rasulullah [Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam] enumerated a Saahib-e-hadm (a person who dies in an impact). Accidents are also included in this category.

Category 2: Burnt. To. Death.

Will my friend go to heaven? died [sic] in a car accident. The accident was really bad that he burned to death in the accident. My friend wasn't that good of a Muslim

. . .

Apparently, your friend may have passed away as a sinner, but Allah awarded him with the exalted position of martyrdom. Jaabir [radhiallaahu anhum] is reported that Nabi [sallallaahu alayhi wasallam] mentioned, ‘Besides the one who has passed away in the path of Allah, there are seven other people who are regarded as martyrs from these seven.’ Nabi [sallallaahu alayhi wasallam] is reported that the one burnt to death is also a martyre.’ (Abu Dawud)

I especially like the tone of the second one. It's like the imam thought "Naaaaah, doubt it, but I better check anyway... [flip flip flip] Huh. How about that?"

Posted by Chris at July 29, 2005 04:47 PM

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