Monday on Bob & Tom (hour 2, roughly 29:00), they featured a listener letter that is a perfect White Trash Wednesday story, with idiotic home medical remedies, a woman cranking out kids by means she does not understand...
TOM GRISWOLD (reading from letter): "One of my friends was in her last year of pharmacy school, doing a retail pharmacy rotation. She was working at a nationally-known retail blah-blah pharmacy chain. A woman with four young children came up to the pharmacy window complaining how upset she was that she was pregnant again and that her birth control was not working. My friend inquired as to what birth control method she was using, and she said 'Mountain Dew.'"...and Bob taking the story off the cliff:
BOB KEVOIAN: I'm sorry?
TOM: "She said, 'I heard that if you drank eight cans of Mountain Dew a day, you won't get pregnant.'"
CHICK MCGEE: Can I be excused?
BOB: I think she misunderstood - if you do it in the can, you won't get pregnant.Actually, I think she might have something there - the rampant squirts you'd get from eight cans of Dew a day could serve as a contraceptive in much the same way that Drew Carey's glasses do. Either that or you'd be shaking so badly that your male partner would have difficulty, shall we say, hitting a moving target.
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Sooooo what you saying is that 8 cans of 'Dew a day is bad? Oh frack...
I can't remember the last day I drank _only_ 8 cans of 'Dew.
Reminds me of one of the few times my better half had a Dew. She said, "I just had a Mountain Dew. Look at my hands shake."
I replied, "Hell, I need three of them just to get the shakes to *stop*."