Fishing The White Trash Way

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Not far from Evansville, way down in the hills and lakes of southern Indiana, lived a man named Jim-Bob who loved to fish. One day, he was hauling his catch home in the back of his pickup truck when he stopped at a traffic light next to the village constable, Billy-Bob.

"Dang, Jim-Bob," said the constable when he saw the back of the truck, "You musta been out on the lake all day to catch that much. Lookee there - that's one, two... lotsa fish."
"Naw, t'weren't more than an hour."
"Don't you be pullin' mah leg, now."
"Naw, really." Jim-Bob knew Billy-Bob loved to fish, too. "Lissen. I'll pick yuh up bright 'n early Saturday, an' I'll show yuh how I does it."

So Saturday comes, and Jim-Bob picks up Billy-Bob and takes him to a lake. They load up the boat and head out, but instead of going to any of the half-dozen spots Billy-Bob knows are good for bluegill, walleye, and whatnot, Jim-Bob drives them right out to the middle of the lake.
"Tarnation," said Billy-Bob. "You ain't gon' catch no fish here, Jim-Bob."
Jim-Bob reaches into a sack under his seat, pulls out a stick of dynamite, lights it off his Winston, and throws it into the water.

BOOM! Dozens of fish float slowly to the surface. Billy-Bob is speechless for a few moments, then all the words try to come out at once.

"Jesus H. Christ, Jim-Bob, are yew crazy? That's possession of explosives - "
Jim-Bob calmly reaches back into the bag and pulls out another stick...
"- and illegal demolition - that there's a felony charge - "
...lights it off his Winston...
"- and the Conservation Officer's gon' shit hisself a pink Twinkee when he gets wind of this - "

Jim-Bob calmly hands the stick with the lit fuse to Billy-Bob. "Lissen, are yew gonna talk, or are yew gonna fish?

It's White Trash Wednesday! Take the whole tour:

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WTW #4 from It Is What It Is on February 9, 2005 12:10 PM

It's White Trash Wednesday and like Gary Gilmore said at his execution Read More

Wooooohwee baby! I knew I could drag me up some o my ole pitchers from my Aubie days, I jest had t’hunt around this big ole mess in my trailer. Heres my goddamn favrit pitcher, with Bobby and Weevil and Preston and Skeeter and Cletus and of cou... Read More

White Trash Blogger from Fistful of Fortnights on February 9, 2005 3:03 PM

In the unspoken rules of bloggersville, it is extremely uncouth and trashy to take the money of your advertisers and spring forth unto the proverbial run shortly thereafter. Even trashier is to bleg for donation money to support your... Read More

Visit all my kins in the Double Wide thar on the left (YER OTHER LEFT) Does Dan of Riehl World View Look like Will Farrell? Or this guy? You decide! Read More

It’s been a big week for WTW with some “hot” new WTW contributors bringing it long and strong. Read More

Yanno from Carnivorous Conservative on February 9, 2005 10:55 PM

In part, I started WTW thinking it would be fun for most of us while also helping one or two very lame bloggers who have problems stringing two letters together using a keyboard because, let's face it, their special education Read More


Old joke.

Besides, the correct phrase for a lot of fish is a "messa fish."

There are more natural lakes in northern Indiana than southern. There are lots of "reclaimed" strip mine pits in southern Indiana that have some good fishing, though.

Yes, I originally came from Evansville (where we used to tell this joke about Kentuckians). But I rose above my humble beginnings to eventually move to ... Iowa.

Um, never mind.

(sigh) Yeah, I know. I think I first heard it on a Justin Wilson album, and of course he was talking about Cajuns.

Since I live in Fort Wayne, I had to make the joke about Evansville (even though it is exactly as you say - the best lakes are all north or northwest of me).

I was just using Hillbilly Counting - "one, two, lots."

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This page contains a single entry by Chris published on February 9, 2005 9:14 AM.

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