Because Everything's Bigger In Texas, Even The Idiots


I've done my best to ignore the Men's Health article naming Fort Wayne as America's Dumbest City, because I know that all these 'best of' and 'worst of' lists are inherently bogus (and yes, I'd be saying the same thing if Fort Wayne had been in, say, the middle of the list) and you can pick the criteria to make them say whatever you want them to. On the other hand, I have to wonder why they counted Nobel Prize winners born inside city limits - but only the physics and medicine winners, not, say, chemistry or economics. I also have to wonder how the city with the fifth-best library in the country for cities in its size range (250k-500k, and Fort Wayne BARELY has 250K) can score dead last in that kind of list. But I've already spent more time on this than I wanted to, and I haven't even gotten to my point yet.

It would appear that Corpus Christi, like Texas in general, doesn't like being second place in anything, so they want to challenge Fort Wayne for the title:

A radio station in Corpus Christi, Texas, (the city dubbed second stupidest) wants to wrest the title from the Summit City.

In a competitive spirit some might consider misguided, Jim Lago, an AM morning host at News Talk 1440 KEYS, says his city doesn’t like finishing second.

He’s even come up with some slogans for his coastal community that should help the public relations push.

“Welcome to Corpus Christi,” one goes, “where C students live like kings.”

Or, “Corpus Christi, our dropouts do better than your high school graduates.”

Or, “Corpus Christi, come be a genius or fit right in.”

His campaign doesn’t stop there. He’d like to arrange a minor league baseball game between the Fort Wayne Wizards and the Corpus Christi Hooks, never mind that that Wizards are single A and the Hooks are double A.

“What’s a few A’s among dumb people?” Lago reasons.

The fact that they want the title proves they're dumber than we are; I say we let them have it.


Of course, the award cannot change hands without the phrase, "Here's your sign," being uttered in the exchange.

Good one. Y'know, Engvall's been using the 'Here's your sign' schtick since at least 1989 - I remember seeing him then at the Funny Bone at Westport Plaza (remember that place? Good times, man, good times).

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This page contains a single entry by Chris published on January 26, 2005 12:27 PM.

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