[Another Survivor post. You have been warned.]
It sure looks like Survivor: Amateur Hour has become a boat race (these Einsteins are the All-Stars? They sure aren't playing like it!); so much so that I'm prepared to call the finish order: Rupert bites the dust next, then Jenna, and Amber beats Boston Rob in the final by 5-2 or worse.
If I were Rupert, here's the endgame gambit I would try. If nothing else, it would allow him to recapture the pirate mentality he embraced in the first episode of Survivor: Pearl Islands. I call it 'Rupert Gone Wild:'
- Get up early one morning, while everybody else's lazy ass is still in bed. Take the tools and throw them in the well.
- Go fishing as usual. Throw the spear in the well.
- Clean and cook fish as usual. Everbody else will be waking up about this time.
- Eat all the fish as fast as he can. Drink as much water as possible.
- Throw the matches in the fire, then pour the last of the drinkable water on the fire to put it out.
- Throw the machete in the well (who's going to stop him? He's carrying a machete, for cryin' out loud!).
- Piss in the well.
- Win both challenges because he's the only one who isn't starving to death.
- It doesn't really matter who he's up against in the final - he'll win. Even if the whole story of his 'scorched earth' strategy comes out. Especially if the 'scorched earth' story comes out - the jury will be delighted that he got over on the Robfather!
Credit to my friend Paul for the 'Amateur Hour' reference and my friend Joe for 'Rupert Gone Wild.'
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